Expectations. Does it matter?

It is not about you meeting my expectations.
It doesn't matter.

Yes, to me but at least not to you.
So it doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter if it doesn't affect you.
It wouldnt be, and it isn't your problem.
It's mine.

What matters is whatever that pleases you.
Watever satisfies you.
Right?
If you are self-centered enough.

Dont like the idea of making people's life miserable.
I wouldnt even try to.
I don't FORCE.
Never liked the idea of forcing people to do something against their own will.

Just give what you can afford to give.
Or what, how much of your time and effort you think I am worth.

Not so much that would leave me asking for more.
Especially when you know you don't have the ability to fulfill.

It is actually a very small and simple request I ask for and you think it's too much for you to handle already.

I can't blame you for being too career-minded or that you cared more for your family and other friends.
I like you for being that.
Being attractively
Serious. Humourous. Intelligent. Doing things with PASSION.
I enjoy your company very much.
I llike the way you make me feel.
You simply have a way with women.
Not exactly a very good thing I suppose.

The problem is that I don't even know what relationship we are in.
I am confused by the illusion given to me.

Afraid to ask because I don't wish to make a fool out of myself.
Allow you to laugh at me for being naive.

But I was really curious to know exactly where I stand.

So eventually it seems that it is all a one-sided thing.
After flaring up and testing you out.
Thought you should at least know how I feel.
Which you didn't seem to care much about.
And that explains all the weird things you got from me.

Don't think I was in any position to demand anything from you.
Overestimated myself.

Sorry that I get too serious at times.
I don't wish to live in a fantasy world.
For I fear for this little fragile heart of mine when reality hits.

Guess this is an adult thing.
Responsible for your own actions and face whatever consequence that comes along.
Caution is the key.
It's not a game for the weak hearted.


It is really comforting to listen to the song " I Will Survive".
How dramatic.
Over dramatized for my case but listen to the lyrics carefully and you will know for yourself if it really helps.